New employee incentive plan -- work or get fired. Now hiring.Kind of makes me believe the employees they're replacing didn't like the incentive plan. I think this makes me laugh so much because when I worked in corporate America and had several employees, it was practically an act of Congress to fire them. You know, fear of lawsuits.
One time I was trying to fire an employee not only because her performance was poor, but she also missed almost as many days as she worked. I was seriously asked by my field HR rep, "does she know she's supposed to work every day?" WHAT? Are you kidding me? Despite my many objections to what full time means and how I inherited her when I took the job, I had to admit in the end that "no, I have not had that exact conversation with her." I guess I didn't realize I would need to.
But I did. I was told I had to have such a conversation with her and then email her asking for confirmation of such conversation because we lived in different states. Then I had to begin the process again. It was agonizingly difficult. After that, every time I hired someone I'd make a point of saying "okay, this job is full time. That means you work Monday - Friday. You can do that 7-4, 8-5, or 9-6. But you must work those days and those hours." Then I made it part of the offer letter. I still think it's hilarious.
If I ever have employees again, I think I will incorporate the sentence from the business sign.
2 comments:
Oh my goodness Julie! Hilarious! If someone can't figure out that full-time means 40 hours/week, then they have issues far beyond the world of work!
I've heard my fair share, since I hire, train, and manage students. We give them flexibility since school comes first, and they still take advantage! I could go on and on with absolutely ridiculous stories.
I think we should submit some of our stories to the writers of "The Office." It would make for some fine television in my opinion! What do you think?
Lindsay - that would be so funny to see on a sitcom. This is exactly the kind of thing I would have expected to see on Seinfeld too. The totally ridiculous experience of every day life. Things that sound so unbelievable but having experienced or witnessed it, we know better.
Some day we can compare employee stories. I'm sure it'll keep us in stitches for a long time!
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