The Saga of the Spider

Let's be clear. I HATE SPIDERS. Hate. Them. Not to mention I'm afraid of them too. We seem to have a never ending supply at the Laurel Campus. One day while we were working I killed 4 of them and 2 millers (or moths for you non-Montanans). Actually there are a plethora of them everywhere this time of year but this year it seems particularly troublesome for me. Here's what happened today....

Well, before I get to today, I have to set it up with what happened last week. Steve went out to the church on Wednesday night and texted me this picture:

I sent him a text back saying "it's official. I need to find a new church." I so amused myself. I naturally assumed he killed it but felt the need to ask him. HE DID NOT! Can you believe that? I asked why on earth he'd let that thing live and he simply stated "it would have made too big of a mess and I didn't want to clean it up. Plus he's not frightened of them. He thinks they are friendly and valuable. My theory is this - when a critter crosses the threshold of a building, they must die. M-U-S-T.

So, today we went out to do some more painting and trim work. Steve was putting all the trim around the floor and window and it was my job to get the touch up pencil and fill in the air nail holes. I was moving along on my knees and I reached over to fill the corner holes. There it was. A spider so big I jumped up and screamed. I ran out of the room looking for Steve. He comes in and casually says "hey, that looks like the one I let live last week." "Not this time," I said. "KILL IT!"

He took a paint brush to budge it out of the corner and as it scurried away, he used the hammer in his other hand and squished that thing flat. There were spider guts everywhere. Steve was not kidding - that thing made a huge mess. There it was, running down the wall. I've never seen anything like it. Of course I'd never seen such a big, ugly spider either.

I wiped it off but was so disgusted and didn't hesitate to tell Steve so. Here's the ensuing few sentences:

S: Calm down Princess.

J: You say that like it's a bad thing.

S: I just didn't know I married a Princess, that's all.

Honestly, I don't know exactly when that happened either. But there it is. I realized it for the first time in August. And I'm okay with it. Then we left and he went directly to the landfill. Made me help unload too. I didn't hesitate to tell him that was not work for a princess but he wasn't so concerned. Actually, he didn't care a single itty bitty bit.

The Familiarity of Family

Labor Day Weekend has become one of my family's biggest get-together weekends. It wasn't always that way. Occasionally my dad would make one of his famous grilled bbq beef thingies (yes, that's the official name) but it wasn't every year.

All that changed in 2006. That's the year we lost dad and Jeff & Carolyn began coming up for the weekend. It still kind of weirds me out that Jeff , who is the age of my oldest sibling, could also be my dad's closest friend. Okay, so that was a sidebar. Anyway, we began that year getting together in honor of my dad and it seems that each year is more dear to my heart than the year before.

This year was no exception. I enjoyed each day but it was Sunday night as we played Taboo for hours that I looked around the table so grateful for family. Many of the clues started with "oh, this happened that time we..." Each time we got the answer. The heck with all the words we couldn't say, we had something better--history. There is a bond between us that few others can really penetrate. It comes from time spent together over the years. Jeff is one of those few that was able to make it from the outside in. This is no small feat given his 6' 8" frame!

It's all about familiarity. That's not to say we haven't developed deep friendships outside of the family because we definitely have. But in this circle of people we share something different and it's not about bloodline. Strangely enough as I thought about family, it dawned on me that the strongest chords holding us together aren't made of the good times. Sure, we've had plenty of those but it's the times of heartbreak that have tested the strength of our family ties.

I can't even believe I'm about to type this but I have fond memories and feelings of those days leading up to dad's funeral. All of us moved through the unbelievably thick fog together, not really knowing where we were going or how we were going to hold up but knowing whatever came at us, we'd handle it together. We didn't have to say a lot of words--most frequently it was just a look we all understood because of familiarity. We made it together because we're family.

Not that we're a perfect group. There is no such thing. But in spite of all our faults and flounderings over the years, we truly enjoy our time together. We drive each other crazy while at the same time love each other like mad.

I wouldn't trade it for anything. And with that I close this post because the overwhelming emotion of it is causing my eyes to brim with tears, making it incredibly difficult to see my screen.

My Blondie Turns 40

Today is the 40th birthday of my best friend and love of my life. I wanted to honor him with a

party but he asked that I not do that because he so hates being the center of attention. The complete opposite of yours truly. I've known Steve for 25 years, over half our lives. We met in youth group and given my affinity for blondies, I had an instant crush. It wasn't until 3 years later that I knew we'd get married one day.

Long before we said "I do" I watched my friend lose his mother and try to pick up the pieces of his life afterwards. He was 16. I cannot even imagine. He amazed me then and he amazes me now.

All life is a gift from God and I am in awe of the life of Steven Lortz. He is passionate about his relationship with Christ, his love of being a Marine, and yes, even his unpredictable wife. He never takes a single day for granted, probably because of the few short years he had with his mother. He lives life to the fullest, pursues his dreams, and never, ever looks back. He never wonders "what was", "what if", or "what could be". He simply lives today with what he's been given today.

I've learned so much from Steve about letting people off the hook, making decisions based on fact and not emotion, and having no regrets.

Steve is one of the true heroes of my life. I cannot fathom my life without him even when he drives me crazy!

Happy birthday Steven--I am crazy about you rather than just plain crazy:) You enrich my life and my family.

Pictures: Steve as a newborn (wasn't he HUGE?); Steve at 3 (don't you love the bowl haircut?); Steve training in 29 Palms about a month before he left for Iraq - 4 years ago but it seems like yesterday.

Fit For Complaining

Today I was at EBC Laurel Campus putting another coat of stain on a new door. Steve was doing some drywall work and helping Rick finish the siding (which looks FABULOUS by the way). So, I had put the stain on and had such a wave of nausea that I had to lie down for a minute.

Out came some ladies from their study. There is one woman who never has an interaction with Steve without complaining. N-E-V-E-R! From my perch I heard her say to him on her way out "you really stunk it up in here with that door". SERIOUSLY? How about "wow, that door is looking nice" or "things are moving along nicely". Nope. It stinks in here. I actually asked Steve if it is possible for her to interact with him without complaining. He said "oh, I suppose it's possible, just not likely." HA! He cracks me up.

Oh, but that wasn't enough. She comes back and says "Steve, the toilet seat in the smaller stall in the women's bathroom doesn't fit right. You need to look at it."

At this point it was all I could do not to jump up and tell her to go home and use her own toilet. Or how about this one - use the OTHER stall if it bothers you? Can you guess what spiritual gifts I do not possess?

People are dying and going to hell, we're working our tails off to get ready for the grand opening and all she can do is complain because the toilet seat isn't EXACTLY right? Are you kidding me?

I was about to explode so I had to call a friend who could calm me down so as not to give her a tongue lashing she'd not soon forget. It just hit me wrong. Is it asking too much for her to encourage her pastor a little bit? Cut him a little slack? Or better yet, grab a brush and start painting? Can she just serve someone else?

My friend said "Juls, some people are just fit for complaining. How boring would our lives be without these people?"

She's right but my answer is, I don't know how boring it would be but I'd like a shot at it.