Things I Like About Me

I finished my Bible study lesson for the week yesterday, increasingly disgruntled at the "in my business" questions I had to answer. There was one question that was unbelievably easy followed by one that caused me to sit there for the longest time and ponder it. The first one was to think about someone I care about and write down only the things I appreciated about them right then. I had at least 10 people that came to mind in seconds and I could have written about them for quite a while. Then came the next question....."Do the same for yourself. What do you like about you?"

UGH...the only great part about that question is that there was no number association such as "what 10 things do you like about you?" That would've sent me over the edge. I don't know why that question is hard to answer. Part of it is pride -- I don't like regurgitating how great I think I am. But part of it, honestly, is that I don't think I'm that great anyway. So as I battled this in my brain I decided the latter is really the most true. Undoubtedly I have things I tend to be proud about but interestingly enough, most don't have a single thing to do with me specifically. I managed to jot down a few things but was left with the aching questions "why is this so hard for me? Am I EVER going to move past this?"

Granted, I've come a long way in this journey but this week's lesson was a reminder for me that I'm not there yet. Where does my value lie? Better yet, in whom does it lie? If I'm trying to find it in anything physical, I will always feel empty. It's when I realize the spiritual battle behind such questions that I find the true source of the problem, and also the answer. My value is not in me (HALLELUJAH!) but in Christ.

In our current sermon series we're in 1 Peter and this week contained 2 of the verses I have clung to over the past few years. It's no coincidence that all these came together for me this week -- I don't believe in coincidence anyway. I used these verses in a talk I did a few years ago and I believe them as much today as I did then; I just need to be as diligent about meditating on them as I used to be.

1 Peter 3:3-4 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (emphasis mine)