It's Hard Not To Be Jaded....

In spite of the horrible things we see on the news every day, I try very hard not to be jaded. I have no delusions that people are basically good. They are not. If so, we wouldn't need law enforcement and the military. Those are just examples and that's not really the point of my post anyway.

Tonight I ran to Office Max for some printer supplies and then decided to go ahead and run to the post office. As I pulled into the parking lot I surveyed my surroundings because it's kind of tucked in the background and the offices around it are virtually deserted by 6:30 pm. I noticed there was one other truck in the parking lot but it had a temporary tag on it so I couldn't even get a snapshot in my head of what the # would be just in case......here's the deal, I really knew I was safe but I kind of like those mystery who-dun-it shows and after a while, that junk sticks in your brain.

So, I took just my credit card and got out of the car locking it as I went. The guy had come out of the post office and was getting in his truck. I walked in front of it but focused on my mission so didn't pay much attention to him. All of a sudden I hear him say loudly "mam!" Seriously, my heart jumped out of my chest. I swung around to see him standing on the running board of his truck and for a brief second thought about bolting to my car, jumping in, and getting out of there. As quickly as the thought was there, it was gone and I regained my sensibilities that if he were really trying to hurt me, he probably wouldn't call me "mam" or actually call out at all. He'd just jump me.

I replied "yes?" and he said "do you know where I can get some stamps?" Okay, now I was REALLY freaked out. We were in the parking lot of the post office! I pointed to the door and said, "um, yeah, in there. They have an automated postal machine that sells stamps." He went on to say he'd tried that and it wouldn't take his card. I asked him if it was out of order but he said it just didn't take his card. So, I presumed it was a money problem. I told him I thought Wal-Mart sold stamps and he said he had a really important letter to mail so he'd try that.

Now composed, I walked into the post office and as I was buying my stamps, I was all of a sudden disgusted with myself that I hadn't told him to wait a second and that I'd be right back with stamps and he could have one. Then again, I was just thrilled he didn't slit my throat. Oh well, nice thought, right?

As I walked out the door I noticed he was still there and was quite pleased that I wasn't frightened by the thought he might be waiting for me. He had his cab light on and was scouring through stacks of papers and sacks in his truck. I mused that he was probably looking for a stamp. Not wanting to scare the daylights out of him I waited in front of his truck until he looked up and then I motioned for him to roll down his window. I walked over and asked, "can I give you a stamp for your letter?" His face lit up like a Christmas tree. "Really?" he asked. I told him sure, it's my pleasure. He then said, "could I actually get one more?" Absolutely, why not? So I gave it to him and he started looking in various compartments in his truck while asking how much he owed me.

"Nothing. It's on me. Glad I could help." He looked up like I'd slapped him or hit him with cold water. "Free? Nothing's free!" he exclaimed. "Well," I said, "this is." He said "well, thank you! Merry Christmas. Happy Thanksgiving and all that." I waved as I walked away and said, "you're welcome. Same to you."

I got in my car fairly ashamed that my first instinct of this man was the worst possible scenario. Just like me, he only wanted some stamps. He was no serial killer, not a thug but just a guy needing to mail a letter. It's hard not to be jaded but it's also smart to be aware of my surroundings and take precautions. This thought comforted me as I went on my way.

As I got about a block away I was further ashamed that I missed an opportunity to share with him the real meaning of Christmas and that the best gift truly is free. I had a brief moment with him and I just didn't see it because I was too caught up with my initial fear and subsequent relief. That's the worst feeling ever.

A Matter of Mediocrity

This morning as I was waking up the radio was on and I listened to caller after caller give a shout out to their family members in current military service. Say what you want about country music (I love it!) but "The Breakfast Flakes" on 102.9 are patriots and activists. And just plain hilarious too.

Before long tears streamed down my face because I was so overwhelmed with gratitude for my freedoms and the sacrifice of so many to secure them. I recalled some of the fears I had not too many years ago as Steve willingly did what he felt from the bottom of his toes was his duty in the lands abroad. He told me what a great honor it would be to die for his country and the protection of freedoms and while I understood his heart, I desperately did not want to lose him.

Something the flakes said stirred up deep feelings in my soul. They commented about how one of the biggest battles we face is right here on American soil as evidenced by the recent tragedy at Fort Hood. An attack within by the erosion of our moral compass, the need to always be politically correct and a most dreaded word....tolerance. Yes, even of those who openly participate in any and every evil thing we can imagine. Those who align themselves with religions that encourage the slaughter of innocent people and Americans in particular. And to say anything causes us to be held in the highest contempt. And so we don't. We walk around with blinders on as if the freedoms so many have died for will last forever. Make no mistake, they will not.

I think of the Roman Empire and the enormity of power and greatness they once had. They crumbled from within. By the end, they were in utter chaos and complete lack of anything moral or good. Should we think we are better, smarter, or more advanced than they? Hardly! They were at the top intellectually, militarily, and (in their own mis-guided way) spiritually in their time. We, too, can and will crumble from within if those who know better don't stand up and cry "enough!" That's what drove our forefathers to this land in the first place.

Without the shedding of blood there is no remission (see Hebrews 9:22) and there is also no freedom. We didn't get the free country we have by talking about it or negotiating for it. The price was high and many were willing to pay that price so their families and the generations after them could hold fast to freedom.

Today on this Veteran's Day, let's honor those who gave their last full measure and do something. Let's not throw up our hands and think it hopeless. It is not. Let's not take our freedoms for granted and be soft or accept mediocrity. We can make a difference. Those who have died deserve no less nor do those coming behind us.

My Husband is 234 Years Old Today

So, how's that for a really catchy title? Given that, he looks superb, don't you think?

Today is the 234th birthday of the United States Marine Corps. It's a special day for anyone honored enough to have earned the title of Marine. It's not something you do or something you did once, it's who you are. Once a Marine, always a Marine.

No other branch like it. Unique in all the world and they are a lean, clean running machine. This applies to them personally as well but I was referring to the Corps in its entirety. Small budget but biggest bang for the buck. Designed to be highly mobile and able to be anywhere they need to be in the shortest amount of time. Congress has long been a friend to the Marine Corps, protecting them as various presidents tried to do away with them....didn't know that, did you?

Okay, so I'll probably be accused of being biased and/or partial but this blood runs Marine green. Happy Birthday not only to my Major but to all Marines everywhere!

Against All Odds, It's A Go

Anyone who has spent maybe 15 minutes with me knows how much I love to go on vacation to new places and see things never captured with these greenies. I actually believe I NEED to do this. Intellectually I can tell myself that's not true but I can't seem to make myself believe it.

Our last vacation was March 2008 when we took "the girl" (also known as our beautiful niece Erica) to New York City for her 18th birthday / graduation gift. We do seriously call her "the girl"--well, mostly Steve because I call her Reeks. Anyway, I knew after that trip nothing would be in sight for quite some time and as this year rolled on, I began to despair at the thought of never having another vacation in my lifetime. Yes, I am also overly dramatic, just ask Steve.

We are making it every month and God is blessing us huge even though we make 50% of what we made in 2007. There just isn't a vacation fund anymore. A few weeks ago we were invited to go with some friends on a cruise for a remarkable price of $299 each. My heart began to pound, my palms got sweaty (at least I think so but we were in a pool so I can't be certain). I knew we had our final frequent flier miles available and I was giddy thinking about it. I proved to Steve in black and white that we could come up with the $800 for the cruise / hotel and we could use his plasma money for excursions. Of course that would mean he would have to start donating again. He said he wanted to think about it and pray about it to see if we should really be doing something else with that money. He also told me not to bug him while he did so. It was 3 days of agony as I waited. Finally, the day came and he said "I think it'd be alright if we went."

I made a beeline for the computer to check it out. I'm pretty sure I moved so fast the flames shot out from the bottom of my shoes. I soon discovered there were no available dates for award travel within 3 weeks of the bon voyage. Shoot. Not to be deterred, I looked at airfare just to see....$500 each to fly. Steve said no, it was too much. I was seriously shattered and yes, I know it was just a vacation but the idea of time off and away was too alluring. I texted my friend and said "thanks for the invite but airfare is a deal breaker for Steve so you two go and have fun. Maybe next time." She messaged back and said she'd keep watching airfare but I knew it was done. I was dejected.

Then came Pastor Appreciation month and a most generous gift. Inside the card it said "we'd like you to do something fun and relaxing with this." We didn't want to accept it. We tried not to but they stood their ground and said it wasn't from them but from the generous God we serve. We didn't want to insult them but it's hard to be a gracious receiver of such generosity. So we humbly accepted and are honoring their request to do something fun and relaxing.

Against all human odds, the cruise is on again. It has nothing to do with human will, desire or provision. It's all about the supernatural workings of the God who is concerned with every detail of my life and wants to give me not only what I need from day to day but also many of my desires. And I'm humbled at this as well as the gift that made it possible by people who were willing to listen and be obedient when God told them to do something. Oh, their blessings are coming. Of that I am certain.

My Poor Neglected Blog

I'm not sure how a person goes from doing nearly a post a day (at least 5 a week) early on and then all of a sudden POOF! it's like 5 a month.

It's certainly not lack of material. My life is a virtual goldmine for spiritual implications, lessons and the like. I also don't think it's lack of desire. To ponder and muse about things helps me process and occasionally helps a weary sojourner or two along the way. I love that.

I think it's just life. Never have I worked so little yet been so busy. When I think of working I'm referring to paid hours. I don't have too many of those. But work is so much more than that for me these days. 90% of my work time is unpaid, aka ministry opportunities. This is why it was so essential for me to quit my second job.

I've not mastered the balance yet I know I will have to weed some things out. Initially I quit my second job for a few reasons--to serve alongside Steve by supporting HIS ministry and to stay more on top of my home to name just two. There are more not worth the read (as if those were).

This is an interesting season. I'm learning so much which I know is preparing me for the next season, whatever that turns out to be. So while my blog is kind of neglected these days, my mind and body are anything but still and lazy.

One day, one day......

Opportunities for Relationship

This last week I had my second teeth cleaning and check up for the year. I do not like going to the dentist. I have no reason not to like it other than a fear based on absolutely nothing but what might be in the future. My dentist is nice guy, every hygienist I've had there has been nice and I've never had a cavity in my entire life. That's likely my problem. I am terrified that one day Dr. P will say "Julie, you have a cavity." I think it might kill me. Okay, okay...over dramatization but it will definitely bum me out and cause me great anxiety.

One of the things that has greatly annoyed me over the years is when the person cleaning my teeth continually tries to engage me in a conversation. Seriously, I cannot respond to a question when their hands are in my mouth! You think they would know this. It's one of those times when silence is really, truly alright. Oh, but no, they just chatter, chatter, chatter.

This time though I ended up with a totally different perspective on the entire thing.

So, "R" did the standard cleaning and x-rays, all the while talking to me. I responded as best I could with the usual annoyance settling in. I know a few things about R because he's cleaned my teeth for 2 years now (I always get the new people, probably because I'm fairly low maintenance). He's a super nice guy but I feel like an Amazon woman around him. He's 4 or 5 inches shorter than I am and I just tower over him. We discovered we went to the same high school about the same time. He's a few years older than me. I have also learned he's Roman Catholic. There are a few other tidbits I've learned about him over the years.

But then it happened. I finished the fluoride treatment and while we waited for the doctor to come do the 2 minute check up, R asked me if I came from a big family. I said yes because I think a family with 5 kids is big these days. So I told him I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters and then asked if he had a big family. He said "yeah, I have 9 sisters and 10 brothers." Real casual like too. I think my jaw dropped open and then I asked what I thought was the next logical question..."from the same parents?" He said "yes. My parents were married until the day my dad died." WOW. I was so flabbergasted. Who has 20 kids?

I asked him the age range and he thought for a second. With that many of course he would have to! He said the youngest is 40, the oldest 60. HOLY COW! Not only 20 kids but in 20 years? Yep, one a year for 20 years. His mother was essentially pregnant from 18 to 38. He then told me his mom is 78 and she does pretty well but does have osteoporosis. The doctors have told her it's because she had so many kids close together that it took too much calcium from her bones. Well, don't you imagine it did?

Then he shared how the previous weekend he'd helped her can tomatoes and they all have a love of gardening they got from their dad. They always had a huge garden because it helped feed the family. Of course it did. How else could a person afford that?

Then I asked the next logical question..."how many bathrooms were in your house?" He said, "oh, just one." ONE?!?! YIKES! Then he said, "well, we weren't all in the house at the same time. The most living there at one time was 14 plus my parents." Oh, you're right, that is so much better. Apparently they staggered their wake time to help with this. Can. Not. Imagine.

He further told me how his childhood home had burned to the ground and he has plans to buy the lot from his mom because it's been empty for years and he's going to put a house on it. And his mom makes the best homemade tortillas you've ever tasted. At least he thinks so. He's probably right too. Since Steve and I absolutely LOVE Mexican food, we talked about great Mexican restaurants in the area and not so great too. He's an expert of sorts, because he grew up on the authentic stuff made from Mexican parents.

It was at this point I realized that rather than be annoyed by the chatter while having my teeth cleaned, I should be delighted at the opportunity to develop a relationship with this man. Not a weird relationship mind you, just an avenue to get to know him and "give an answer to him who asks me to give the reason for the hope that I have" (1 Peter 3:15).

Opportunities all around me with people I interact with regularly and up to now I've largely missed it. "No more" is my prayer.

The Saga of the Spider

Let's be clear. I HATE SPIDERS. Hate. Them. Not to mention I'm afraid of them too. We seem to have a never ending supply at the Laurel Campus. One day while we were working I killed 4 of them and 2 millers (or moths for you non-Montanans). Actually there are a plethora of them everywhere this time of year but this year it seems particularly troublesome for me. Here's what happened today....

Well, before I get to today, I have to set it up with what happened last week. Steve went out to the church on Wednesday night and texted me this picture:

I sent him a text back saying "it's official. I need to find a new church." I so amused myself. I naturally assumed he killed it but felt the need to ask him. HE DID NOT! Can you believe that? I asked why on earth he'd let that thing live and he simply stated "it would have made too big of a mess and I didn't want to clean it up. Plus he's not frightened of them. He thinks they are friendly and valuable. My theory is this - when a critter crosses the threshold of a building, they must die. M-U-S-T.

So, today we went out to do some more painting and trim work. Steve was putting all the trim around the floor and window and it was my job to get the touch up pencil and fill in the air nail holes. I was moving along on my knees and I reached over to fill the corner holes. There it was. A spider so big I jumped up and screamed. I ran out of the room looking for Steve. He comes in and casually says "hey, that looks like the one I let live last week." "Not this time," I said. "KILL IT!"

He took a paint brush to budge it out of the corner and as it scurried away, he used the hammer in his other hand and squished that thing flat. There were spider guts everywhere. Steve was not kidding - that thing made a huge mess. There it was, running down the wall. I've never seen anything like it. Of course I'd never seen such a big, ugly spider either.

I wiped it off but was so disgusted and didn't hesitate to tell Steve so. Here's the ensuing few sentences:

S: Calm down Princess.

J: You say that like it's a bad thing.

S: I just didn't know I married a Princess, that's all.

Honestly, I don't know exactly when that happened either. But there it is. I realized it for the first time in August. And I'm okay with it. Then we left and he went directly to the landfill. Made me help unload too. I didn't hesitate to tell him that was not work for a princess but he wasn't so concerned. Actually, he didn't care a single itty bitty bit.