Happy Birthday Blondie!

Today is "my" Steven's birthday. It's actually his real birthday; since he's a Marine he gets 2 a year (which by the way is a huge rip-off to me). I think I get just as excited for his birthday as he does! I've always made a big deal over it. The first year we were married was the first time in 3 years that such a fuss had been made about his birthday. He lost his mother when he was 16 and while she had made his day special before that, it kind of stopped. Deep in my heart I believe he loves for me to do it too even though he would never say that.

Of course now his birthday is memorialized across the country because of the attacks of 6 years ago. And just 2 years ago he was exactly where he wanted to be on his birthday -- in Iraq. After all, they ruined his birthday and he needed to take it back!

So, Happy Birthday blondie! Enjoy your day, live it up because tomorrow it's all over -- it's not almost your birthday anymore.

Monday Fun-Day

We had the best time with Erica and Peter on Monday...and where was my camera? Sitting on my counter at home. AARRGGHH! I specifically made a mental note to bring it so now we know what my mental capacity is.

We first went to Pictograph State Park and I couldn't believe how much that place has changed. The last time I was there I was 19 and dating Steve. I went with his family for a picnic one Sunday after church. Back in the "old days" you could climb up on top and the view was amazing -- now that is all privately owned. Bummer. Additionally there was a paved walkway between the 3 caves. We actually started at the end which, by the way, is a steeper climb than had we gone the right way. Note to self: start with "1" next time!

We didn't exactly stay on the "recommended" paved route which actually made it more fun. We climbed the rocks and Peter thought that was one of the most fascinating things he's ever done. After a picnic lunch we headed to Two Moon park and followed the leisurely trails to the river and back.

While Erica is better at it that I am, we discovered neither one of us is particularly talented at skipping rocks. My first attempt didn't even make it into the water - yep, I'm that inept! Erica had one that didn't make it to the water as well and that one hit her brother square in the leg so as you can see, we're both rock skipping idiots. Fortunately we're also adorable and incredibly smart so we'll leave that talent to others.

The best part of the day was that it was simple, we were able to share some of the same activities we did as kids, we spent the day out in God's creation, and we just enjoyed the company of one another. One day they'll be able to take their kids (or their nieces and nephews) to the same place and recount the fun they had with us. And the cycle of life continues.

The Preacher

Steve preached for the first time this past Sunday and I found myself thinking, "he's pretty good!" I'm not necessarily surprised because not only was he thoroughly prepared, he was also being obedient which means, of course, that God was using him and blessing him. For a first sermon it was unbelievably good, clear, and laid out succinctly; believe me when I tell you I was just as nervous as he was. I desperately wanted him to be well received and I wanted the entire thing to go smoothly so he wouldn't be discouraged.

I've heard many sermons in my day and been bored to tears by the most seasoned pastors. I attribute this more to me than them because of my attitude or approach to the service. I've come to realize God can (and does) use anybody who will be a mere vessel. The rest is up to him to accomplish. Therein lies the key -- Steve doesn't need to be eloquent or perfect -- he just needs to do what God has asked him to do and so he has.

He doesn't intend to preach frequently at this point but since our pastor was on vacation and we're just starting phase 2 at CBC, he found it the perfect opportunity to share his vision for the church and let them know where, as their leader, he plans to take them.

I'm in awe at the spiritual growth in Steve which started long before he went to Iraq but ramped up significantly while he was there and since he returned. I almost can't believe it's the same guy. Thus is the sanctifying work.......

He Talks Funny

The title of this post is borrowed from a good family friend. He's actually more than a friend. I realized this weekend that to me, he is my 3rd brother (as if I needed another one!). His name is Jeff and he's from Texas -- that's why he talks funny.

This weekend Jeff and his wife, Carolyn, came to Montana for the 2nd annual Labor Day barbeque and that is why he's on my mind today. He brought with him a copy of a speech he did in his Toastmasters club about my dad. In that speech he referred to how my dad would frequently introduce him, "I want you to meet my good friend Jeffrey, he's from Texas, he talks funny." I wept profusely as I read his speech and almost have it memorized myself.

Jeff started coming to Montana when he was 25 (I was 17) as a programming consultant at the company where dad worked. As was customary with my parents, they took him under their wing, opened our (their) home to him, fed him every night he was in town, and he assimilated into our family as if he'd always been there. He was in Montana about a week a month for 18 years and became one of my dad's closest friends and confidantes. As you might imagine he also celebrated birthdays, weddings, births, and many other events with us. Additionally, he mourned with us during times of suffering, death, and sickness. And along with my brothers, husband, and brother-in-law, he was a pallbearer at dad's funeral. He is family.

The thing that struck me most about Jeff's speech was how he talked about my dad and the emotion he put into his words. I know how I feel about dad, but to hear it from someone who became part of our family later touched me beyond words. It is evidence that my dad was always constant, that he loved his family, he loved God, and he genuinely cared about other people. I knew all this about my dad but the confirmation from someone else is extremely gratifying.

Jeff loved my dad and he's been a source of great support for my mom in the last year and a half. The fact that he and Carolyn have spent their time and money to spend the past 2 Labor Day weekends with his Montana Family is proof in action. He ended his speech by commenting:

I look forward to my first day in Heaven, to bow before my Lord and Savior...to walk the streets of gold and come upon a group of people I don't know and hear, "I want you to meet my good friend Jeffrey, he's from Texas, he talks funny!"

We might not get to see him much but we love Jeff, we love what he's brought to our family, and we are grateful for the friendship he brought to dad's life.

Thanks Jeff (and Carolyn) -- we love and appreciate you, even if you are from Texas and you talk funny!

What a Wonderful Friend

Today I had to break the news to a dear friend that a long-planned visit with her was not going to happen. I've known it wouldn't be a reality for over a month but I was in denial about it, desperately hoping something would change.

I didn't even initiate the conversation - she did when she told me about a mission trip she is leaving for tomorrow. As it turns out, the weekend we were going to spend together will find her on a retreat and I was strangely relieved and exhilarated to hear that she had a schedule problem because I could stop feeling guilty about it.

I e-mailed her and said, "I won't feel so bad since you'll be gone and it wouldn't have worked out. Now I don't have to add guilt to my discouragement." Her response made me remember why I miss her so badly and I get teary just thinking about the void I've felt since she moved. I still count her one of my closest friends but it's just not the same as living down the street, you know? Anyway, here is her response and after reading this, you'll understand why I love and adore her....and desperately miss her too! These are the friendships worth making.

"You NEVER have to add guilt to anything related to me. I love you."

Fun With Mom

Last night I had an incredibly fun time with my mom. I would post pictures but at this point I don't even attempt to take pictures of my mother without her explicit permission - she hates them! It would have made for a good post though...

Anyway, a couple of years ago she canned some corn relish that was phenomenal and so I asked her to come and help me do it. The timing was good because I was freezing several dozen ears of corn for the winter anyway.

It was so much fun to do this and to continue learning this skill from a woman who has spent much of her life doing it and let's face it, canning is a dying art. I'd go so far as to say she's an expert. And I love to hear the memories that flood back as she does it with me. It's like when I go to the fair and I'm overwhelmed with memories of other times doing the same thing.

These times are so precious and I'll get to live them all over again about January when I make corn chowder and remember the hot August night that made it possible. Parents are a gift from God and I'm so blessed to have been given the ones I was and to be friends with them in my adulthood!

Dueling Views

I had a really interesting and enlightening conversation with a woman today and as I relayed it to Steve at lunch, he wasn't at all enlightened. As a matter of fact, what was a mystery to me was not at all mysterious to him. Evidently he sees far more clearly than I do.

Here's the gist: there is a situation in which I see things very differently than this woman does. It's not a conflict or anything, just a circumstance. Where I don't see myself as valuable, needed, or fitting in, she saw me as extremely value added and not only fitting in but being a ring leader (so to speak).

As I tell this to Steve he told me that's about right. I had no idea what he meant so I said "what do you mean that's right?" And he said "Because it's the truth." Not ready to let it die I asked "Why am I always the liar?" He said "You're not lying, you're just deceived." AARRGGH!! So then I said "Why am I the one who is deceived and not her?" And his response is classic, "Because you're the one with self image problems. If there's a way that makes you feel bad about yourself, you'll take it." To that I retorted, "Well, with my last job I didn't have self image problems -- I knew I was an asset and added value to our division because DL (my former boss) told me so and acted it on it too."

As if the last line weren't enough of classic Steve, he said, "That's the problem -- you're letting others set your value and not God." With that the conversation ended - I had nothing else to add, retort, or even a way to annoy him (my specialty).

You know why? Because he's right.